Mexifornia headlines, 2039

# Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.

# White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia’s third language.

# Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

# Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.

# Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

# Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

# 85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

# Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

# Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.

# Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

# Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.

# New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2040.

# IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

# Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines.

5 comments for “Mexifornia headlines, 2039

  1. Mark Matis
    March 19, 2019 at 17:14

    The continuing problem in Florida is from our invaders from the Big Craphole:

    • March 19, 2019 at 17:45


    • Chuckles
      March 19, 2019 at 18:25

      It’s the light that attracts them

  2. microdave
    March 19, 2019 at 21:22

    Re #1 Assumes that EV’s use conventional brush & commutator DC motors, and the sparking produces the ozone. However, AC motors and variable frequency inverter drives are far more likely to be standard fit, if they aren’t already.

    In any case, with the continuation of Governor Brown’s lunatic energy policies, there won’t be any electricity to charge them in the first place…

    • March 20, 2019 at 00:00

      Of course there will be electricity. They will import it via the Great Chinese People’s Sub-Pacific Cable.

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