Save the satirist?

It’s always got me into trouble – observing someone needing to be taken down a peg or two and it’s so difficult not to.

To vaguely recall Raymond Chandler, in Farewell, My Lovely, on some miscreant:

I was about to make a remark. Remarks were crying out to be made with X.

Something like that. Some people can be witty about it:

… and they’re employed as cartoonists for major papers. Others are part-timers:


Me? I tend to just be cutting:

And no respecter of idiots:

With people dear to me though, I tend to go more direct, saying I don’t appreciate something or other – maybe most of us operate that way.

There’s no doubt that any considering themselves Christian need to be careful and sparing because a remark can remain a long time. For example, I was accused of ‘overweening’ arrogance.

Thing is, it was true, so there was no good retort. Therefore I just said eff off – very witty. Not.

Another said that I was a kitten with the claws out. Ouch, as the Cats are a team I support. So yes, I am a Cat, I’m going to be sailing on a Cat again, the internet is the home of Cats.

Usually, nothing gets through the defences for that reason – the person has been identified as enemy already – one is prepared, a lot of intelligence has been passed on to a pundit on the net and he hears what’s going on and then ignores it.

So when someone comes along and does a bit of ‘drive-by sniping’, as a friend put it, then one is either prepared or else resorts to the unwitty, ‘That’s not appreciated.’

Someone like the Smurth though above – were I in the room with her and were she taking questions, I’d wait my turn, smile my sweetest smile and say, in my most polite manner:

Lady Smurf, I just wanted to ask if you’re aware you have a food stain on your dress, three inches south of your shoulder blades, just to the right …

… then exit the room. And no, I’d not be proud of doing that but it should have the desired effect all the same.

But again, as with most of you, you’d only do that if it was a person making remarks such as those above – Ward and Smurf or even Coswallop from the Guardian, because their bubbles really do need pricking.

Now, were someone to walk around observing all and sundry like that as a rule, as their default, then they’re not very nice people. But if the remark is reserved for the brickable-faced type, then all’s fair in love and war and in fact, remarks really cry out to be made.

Unless, of course, you’re of the right, in which case you’re arrested and given 28 days.


I’d go so far as to say it’s really important to give em hell.  There was another comment made about Authority and how it must always be kept on its toes, otherwise the whole point of a civilised land falls to the ground.

The satirists are necessary, but it still doesn’t stop the Authority’s murderous inclinations, sacrificing you for their cause. And from next year, methinks it’s going to assume proportions beyond 28 days.

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