I am such a dolent man,
I eptly work each day;
My acts are all becilic,
I’ve just ane things to say.
My nerves are strung, my hair is kempt,
I’m gusting and I’m span:
I look with dain on everyone
And am a pudent man.
I travel cognito and make
A delible impression:
I overcome a slight chalance,
With gruntled self-possesion.
My dignation would be great
If I should digent be:
I trust my vagance will bring
An astrous life for me.”
Get the feeling we’ve run this – oh well, here ’tis again:
The wind was rough
And cold and blough.
She kept her hands within her mough.
It chilled her through,
Her nose turned blough,
And still the squal the faster flough –
And yet, although There was no snough,
The weather was a cruel fough.
It made her cough,
Please do not scough,
She coughed until her hat blough ough.
A fellow they call Aloysius
Of his wife and a gent grew suspysius
And as quick as a wink
Found the two by the sink
But they only were doing the dysies
A merchant addressing a debtor
Remarked in the course of his lebtor
That he chose to suppose
A man knose what he ose;
And the sooner he pays it the bebtor
There once was a man who for hiccough
Tried all of the cures he could piccough,
And the best without doubt,
As at last he found ouht,
Is warm water and salt in a ticcough… More here ...
There was a young lady named Wemyss,
Who, it semyss, was troubled with dremyss.
She would wake in the night,
And, in terrible fright,
Shake the bemyss of the house with her scremyss.
A pretty school-mistress named Beauchamp,
Said, “These awful boys, how shall I teauchamp?
For they will not behave,
Although I look grave
And with tears in my eyes I beseauchamp.”
There was a professor of Caius
Who measured six feet round the knaius;
He went down to Harwich
Nineteen in a carwich,
And found it a terrible squaius.
There lived a young lady named Geoghegan,
The name is apparently Peoghegan,
She’ll be changing it solquhoun
For that of Colquhoun,
But the date is at present a veoghegan.… More here ...
A fair die bearing the numbers 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 is repeatedly thrown until the running total first exceeds 12. What’s the most likely total that will be obtained?… More here ...