Archive | Humour

RSS feed for this section

cartoons and articles, some political

TGI Friday

#

Me: My friend really likes you.
Her: I’m a lesbian.
Me: Ah ok…
Her: …
Me: …
Her: …
Me: So… What part of Lesbia are you from?

#

BMW have introduced a concept car. Apparently it has indicators.

All this nonsense about BMW drivers not using indicators is totally uncalled for. Why only today I saw one with all four flashing at once while he was parked on a pavement blocking a wheelchair ramp while he made a phone call and ate his lunch.…

Was Jack Straw right? You be the judge

serena the woman

Yeah, gives her the clap. Bet he wouldn’t hold her in his arms though.

There really is something very, very funny [to a mind in this country] in a whole multitude of people across the world, in the process of or having watched Wimbledon, nicely imbibed by this stage judging by comments … and they all descend on the Mail to have a sort of national conversation on the tennis and unrelated issues.…

The ark

An oldie but a goodie:

If Noah built the ark today!

The Lord spoke to Noah and said: “In six months I’m going to make it rain until the whole earth is covered with water and all the evil people are destroyed. But I want to save a few good people, and two of every kind of living thing on the planet. I am ordering you to build an Ark.”

And in a flash of lightning he delivered the specifications for an Ark. “OK,” said Noah, trembling in fear and fumbling with the blueprints.

“Six months, and it starts to rain,” thundered the Lord. “You’d better have my Ark completed, or learn how to swim for a very long time.”

And six months passed. The skies began to cloud up and rain began to fall.

The Lord saw that Noah was sitting in his front yard, weeping. And there was no Ark.…

Hunted like animals

Just beautiful:

Interpol places two former FIFA officials including ex vice-president Jack Warner on its most wanted list as corruption probe casts doubt on the Russia and Qatar World Cups; international alerts issued by Interpol for Jack Warner and Nicolas Leoz and four other executives accused of racketeering and corruption.

Comes day after disgraced president Sepp Blatter quits amid FBI probe, officials demand re-run of votes for the 2018 and 2022 World Cups, FA chief:  ‘If I was the Qatari organisers, I wouldn’t sleep very well tonight.’