Long weekend [11]

61. An oldy but a goody, via Rossa’s mother

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, he leaned out the window and asked the cowboy:

“If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?”

Bud looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, “Sure, why not?”

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

Long weekend [10]

60.  Quite a few people I know are coming up to the big Six-Oh this year – it just has that touch of … well, finality to it, don’t you think? 🙂 Days of chasing the fillies are over, life is over … I’m sure if I ever got to 60, that’s how I’d feel.

And are you now slipper-slobby and taking no more care?  Fie – here’s a guide to help you get back up:

Here are some Z-listers turning or having turned 60 this year:

Long weekend [9]

55.  We never know what will happen and when

Felt good enough to go downstairs with binbags of rubbish, check mail etc. and a neighbour went past, asked about gas bill.  He and two people from non-existent addresses [we know this] have had demands from Scottish Power for £1200 apiece.

He is on a payment scheme, as many of you are, in order to get a cheaper tariff, I got out of that years ago, it’s a scam and i use pay as you go. Costs more but they can’t diddle you.  Also, never ever let utilities companies do direct debit.

Problem was he is with SP himself so it’s much more difficult for him. I had a bill from a different company some years back and I told them I pay, say, Superpower and am NOT going to pay them for any reason.  Then I contacted my own Superpower and said fix it.  They said no I must resolve it.

No way, your error, you fix it or it’s ombudsman. They fixed it.

Long weekend [8]

47.  More than luvvy loggerheads

I’m not remotely interested in the morning tele tiff but am most interested in the dynamics in one male surrounded by females.

Reason is that most of my work situations have been as the lone male surrounded by wimmin and one saving factor is that the women themselves do not want you buying into their squabbles. There’s a little bit of ‘stay out of it, you’re a man, you know nothing’ but there’s also a bit of embarrassment for them as they wish to present their best faces to anyone in fact.

So thank goodness I was spared these but when I got back over here, I found myself in a work situation which was peculiar. There were three women regulars, inc. the boss, and one was quite close to me, there was immense goodwill for a long time but the third was the issue.

Long weekend [7]

46.  The first step to turning it round

Emily Segal says not being taught many life skills made her feel she’d been “reborn as stupid” after leaving school.

The presenter told 5 Live’s Sarah Brett she wishes she’d been taught formal email etiquette, financial literacy and how to work storage heaters at school.

I’ve seen a pejorative comment on her stupidity but beg to differ in one sense – she has recognised it, in the same way The Who did in 905.

Like an addict [see 37], that first step ending denial and recognising that there is work to do is so vast a step it can scarce be exaggerated.  Huge step forward and upward.

Now, step two is going to be everything. In bad company or with only the guardian, CNN or modern songs and film, chances are slim of ever climbing out of the abyss. She must learn alternative search methods, start educating herself.

There is also that other method I keep obliquely referring to and then not pursuing.

So I wish her well but the culpability of academia methinks is worthy of a special ring in hell – methinks that’s where these professors et al are headed for doing this to those minds.

45.  Momentum and other communist crazies

Long weekend [6]

36. Scrolling or Read More link?

This post is in equal parts for fellow bloggers, plus non-blogging readers.

Uberblogger and author of standing Peter Grant, otherwise known as Bayou Renaissance Man, left this comment:

I like the new long format. Much easier to scroll down than to jump from one page to another, then back, then jump again, and so on ad nauseam.

Yep, there is that but let’s analyse it a bit more. Sure it’s good for the scrolling but it needs to have sections delineated better, as FoS does. They need perhaps header lines between numbers, maybe in bold and brighter-coloured to stand out more.

Some substantial negatives: